words women use a day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000. 

The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men..... 

The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'

 

Why does a man like love at first sight?
It saves them a lot of time.

How can you tell soap operas are fictional?
In real life, men aren't affectionate out of bed.

Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
To stop the snoring before it starts.

Why don't men have mid-life crises?
They stay stuck in adolescence.

How does a man show he's planning for the Future?
He buys two cases of beer instead of one.

How was Colonel Sanders a typical male?
All he cared about were legs, breasts, and thighs.

How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus?
At the circus the clowns don't talk.

Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?
Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.

What do you call a woman with half a brain?
Gifted.

Husband: Want a quickie?
Wife: As opposed to what?

Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.

What do you have when you have two little balls in your hand?
A man's undivided attention.

How is a man like a snowstorm?
Because you don't know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get, or how long it'll stay.